Some time ago I was talking to a female friend of mine who has been married a long time. She commented on the fact she and her hubby would occasional get into spats, nothing significant but, annoying nonetheless. You can’t help but be with someone a long time and not occasionally brush up against each other and step on the other person’s toes.
So, I was listening to her and I told her I knew of a way she could win each and every argument she had with her husband. Literally, I told her there was a way she could end every argument immediately and come out on the winning end each and every time.
So, when she heard me say that, she was curious to find out what the way was, what was the secret to managing to be the victor in any spat she may have with her spouse.
Now, I’m going to give you guys the answer. It may sound extremely sexist but, I hate to say it, deep down it’s true and if you catch any man at one of those moments of pure unadulterated truth, he will admit, yes, indeed this does work.
All a woman needs to do to win any argument with a man is to walk over to him, unzip his pants and suck his d*ck.
OW!
Yes, I hear the groans in the gallery. I hear the sharp intake of breath as the shock of the statement settles in but, hear me out.
It is virtually impossible for any man to be angry when he is getting fellatio. If you don’t believe me, try it.
Now, my friend said to me she didn’t want to win an argument that way and while I can understand that, it didn’t make sense. See, this is supposed to be the person you love, the person you cherish and have chosen to spend your life with. This is something no matter who the man, makes a man happy!
If you don’t believe me go ask Bill Clinton.
Unfortunately, we men are ruled by our genitals. Maybe the world would be a better place if that weren’t the case but, it’s true. I think it is something that is hard-wired into us as a species. Something that is there for a reason. It causes men a lot of the time to make some really, really stupid decisions. Like, anytime you ever watch one of those Dateline NBC shows To Catch A Predator? There you go! Stupid decisions motivated almost entirely by a man’s genitals.
Getting back to winning arguments though...
So, my friend said to me she didn’t like winning an argument that way but every guy I spoke to about it later agreed! It’s just very difficult (I was going to say hard but thought better of it) to stay angry when you are on the receiving end of some oral sex. We like oral sex, maybe it isn’t the be all and end all of the whole sex thing but, it certainly is an added plus and you notice it when it’s not part of the menu.
A lot of ladies just beg off the whole oral sex thing though and the other day I was reading something which just seemed to give a woman one more excuse not to do it:
Researchers have linked oral sex to a type of throat cancer, saying that those who engaged in the sexual act with more than six partners over the course of their lifetime were nine times more likely to develop oropharyngeal cancer.
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